When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
