I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
