I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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