I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
do herpes really smell.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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