Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
