So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
then he tried to convert me to islam
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
