i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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