i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
