I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
