i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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