The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize