Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
