i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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