Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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