help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize