very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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