I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
