I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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