Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
