carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
