I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
and you said cock pushups were impossible
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
