Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
