oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I love you. Go after that dick
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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