so that wasnt chicken after all
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
