so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
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