By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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