i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
