he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize