I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
