well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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