I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
