Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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