i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize