i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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