arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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