my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
