I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
