I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
