Sry I called you an 8
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
