But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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