I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
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