Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
