Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
