I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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