she was so not down for the gang bang
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
