my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
