It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
