Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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