He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Randomize