Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
His hands were made for my vagina.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
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