I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
